Culture of coma

Today was a dense day. But then, any day filled with the conversations about early family systems’ experiences is bound to be dense.

We went through what are typically referred to as family systems ‘roles’ and recognized that they are strategies – and that they are a choice. These are not our identities. They are not who we are. They are choices we make to keep ourselves safe at a time in our lives when we are tender and vulnerable and indeed, legitimately at the mercy of our environment. Unless we take the time to notice, these habits gain such momentum over time that we think they define who we are. And yet, in any moment, we can stand in the ‘now’ and choose to engage otherwise.

By the end of this day, it became very clear to us all that the only way to move through the thick, apparently impenatrable shield that both surrounds and makes up our cultural habits of body, behaviour and thought, is authenticity. One second of authentic presence can shatter what has been held in place through decades of deceit, self-betrayal, glancing away and silencing ourselves. The challenge is: to be authentic, we must be willing to show up for our own life.

Breathing is good…..

Diving deep and surfacing

It occurred to me that it’s been a while since I’ve shared my thoughts here. It certainly isn’t because I’m not having them!

I’m in Halifax for two weeks, spending this first week with a small group of courageous and compelling women who are determined to live their lives more fully – and meaningfully. In this five-day ‘Engaging…and awakening others’ experience, we are doing just that: engaging what comes up as we share our lives with each other. Inevitably, we discover that ‘engaging’ a life when we are cloaked or inauthentic, will produce a very different result in our world than engaging when decloaked…able to be seen in the magnificence of our imperfection…and willing to be the creators of our own experience.

It’s not always easy, and it’s always worth it. Sometimes, the tears are from laughter and sometimes they just flow to make room for a new way of considering the world. But always, they are an essential expression of a life transforming itself into a more authentic one.

There is not a day that goes by that I am not deeply grateful for my life. My days are filled with the promise of a better world and the evidence that it’s on its way. As my day comes to an end, I am aware that I have no idea what tomorrow will bring. As I choose to trust myself, what emerges effortlessly will guide me to the next step.

Breathing is good…..

Sizzling thoughts

Have you ever noticed what happens when you drop water onto the surface of a hot frying pan? There is a distinct sound…bouncing droplets…and then they become one with the surface of the pan. Activity and then absorption.

For the last few days, my thoughts have been doing that. Something comes to mind…I hear that sound and notice the thought relative to the context that it is calling up and then the thought is absorbed/integrated into the background of the context it fits into.

My thoughts are moving faster than my ability to track them and make sense of them. And yet, every time I allow one to just simply move, there is a flood….a tsunami…and new thoughts that come behind it. I’ve given up trying to make sense of them; or put any order to them. I just trust their flow and I know that it will all fall into place.

I know the direction that I’m going in. No surprises there! It has to do with women. Women being well…being enlivened…and being willing to emerge from the shadows and bring strength of definition to who they/we are in the world. Being willing to be seen and heard. Women willing to have edges. Women willing to walk away from being ‘the power behind the throne’ – being invisible in their challenges and burdens – and claiming the force that they/we already are in the world. Noreen (Sekhmet Rising) comes to mind. Unleashed!

It has to do with women no longer being willing to be silent and sick. They go together. And in that order.

It has to do with letting go of all that is familiar to me. As much as it all has been, I know there is more – and that ‘more’ will not be contained in the box of what has been.

I remind myself, daily….breathing is good.

Pregnant with potential

We cannot evoke potential in others when we are unwilling to claim it in ourselves. Potential is not a thing – it is a vibration that awakens to the presence of itself. When I honour it in me, it calls to itself in you.

Women have the capacity to be pregnant. Our bodies are designed for it – whether we use it or not.

At at an Environment level of thinking, we become pregnant with a child – with another living being that is taking shape inside us, with nothing for us to do but let go and trust the natural process that our body is designed to engage. We are not required to engage any other way.

At higher levels of thinking, we can become pregnant with other expressions of life. A willingness to explore and engage an Emerging Future is just such a force of life.

There is much for us to discover – and the time is now.

Breathing is good…..

Soul Searching

Today was an interesting mix of Jennifer Lopez and Ghost Rider – both soul-searching in their own unique way. Leaves me thinking how my soul searching is unique to me.

JoLo (do they still call her that???) was being interviewed and mentioned that she pulled back from her career about four years ago to ponder the important things in her life. Things like: why am I in this business? What do I love about this business? What do I want to accomplish in my life with this business?

Good questions, I thought – and applicable to my life, too. I think I’ll ponder those for a bit.

‘Ghost Rider’ capped my day, yet another thing to cause me to ponder: do we ever really make a difference if we’re not willing to look a little weird to everyone else?

Tomorrow is another day of synchronicities, metaphors and enquiries that edge me toward the deep end of the pool. Lucky for me, I’m amphibious.

Breathing is good…..

Pondering the intelligence of magic

In this moment, there is a lull in the storm of potential. And given the density and intensity of what is occurring in the world, it will take a storm of potential to make a difference.

Long gone is the moment for incremental change. It’s time has come and gone, leaving us wondering: how do we redirect a force that has now begun to shape itself?

What makes any organic system interesting is the fact that it is not predictable. Its probabilities can be estimated but the specifics of its outcomes cannot. And maybe that’s the good news. In the intelligent, living organic systems that I am/you are/the world is, what appears probable need not necessarily be so.

This is the domain of magic. What appears probable – or even impossible! – need not necessarily be so. In order for magic to occur, we must first consider that we are magical, or at least capable of magic as an outcome. Without our willingness to consider that (as a probability), we are left with logic and reason. And we already know that’s what got us all here in the first place.

Breathing is good…

One more thought…

One more thought for today, and then I’m done.

It’s never life – it’s always how we live it. Does it come in chocolate?

Breathing is good….

Transformation: safety, science and a touch of the sacred

I am gaining clarity on what I’m doing here…in this world, in this time and space.

The task is a simple one: what we call transformation is about waking up. Waking up is not just about my own awakening, but is also about staying awake and awakening others. The alternative is to roam awake in a world asleep – and wander alone – or in despair, to allow myself to go back to sleep.

I know how to wake up and awaken others so that not only do they wake up, they discover how to stay awake and awaken others – and so does anyone else who has experienced the WEL-Systems intensives. In my time, I have created a world that has become large enough not only to be able to invite others in to play, but ever-expanding to make room for those awakening to awaken their others and invite THEM in to play! In this way, my world – the world – expands.

I am learning and gaining clarity of what the message is, within this purpose.

Transformation has, for generations, been sought through the process of the intellect managing and guiding and controlling the body. What I have come to know as my truth is that transformation can only occur when I free my body from the constraints of my intellect. In that moment, the full power of my body is accessed and released to engage rapidly, profoundly and meta-physically to manifest MORE of who I am!

Transformation has three essentials: safety, science and a touch of the sacred. Without all three present at the same time, the result is incremental change. Safety is an inside job – and only my body knows how to create and manifest that experience for me. Unless and until I become willing and able to LIVE that, I am incapable of engaging. And without my ability to ENGAGE, it’s just empty blah-blah-blah. Like moving through the world wrapped in saran wrap, being able to see and be seen, and yet never touch or be touched. Experience demands engaging.

When I free my body of being hostage to my intellect, I free my Self to enliven the tissue. The tissue opens, expands and becomes enlivened with the potential of the essence of who I am – of the Signal from Self – and my world changes in an instant. One breath to the next. Transformation is about profound, generative and instant change – in a breath.

I know there is more to come. Where it will take me I have no idea. What I do know is that I’m ready.

Breathing is good…..

Awake!

Today – in this moment – I am aware of how alive I am! If I notice that, then I MUST be awake. Waking up is the key to it all.

Waking up from what? The need to wake up presupposes that I am somehow asleep. Deep sleep equals coma. Coma is not flatline – it is motionless chaos.

I remember that dream from long ago. The one about meeting the goddess walking along the beach, and as the conversation unfolds she morphs into me. I am, already, that which I seek.

In the dream, being reminded of having chosen to forget so that I might become willing to engage. As I ENGAGE in awakening others to remember who they are, I will remember who I am.

In this moment, I become aware of this thought: the goddess awakens to awaken other goddesses and in doing so, awakens to more of who she is. The next thought: as the goddesses awaken, the collective awakening awakens the goddess in us all. The goddess in the women and the men – and things shift.

It is never about gender – it is about Essential Being of us all.

I am surrounded by goddesses awake and awakening. Goddesses in both the women and the men in my life. In this moment, I know that I am not alone.

Today, I read the blog of the goddess that lives in Ray Landry (see WEL-Systems Blogging Community link). I am moved and feel greater strenght in myself, knowing that he is here. The voice of the goddess that Ray is, speaks with a different resonnance. I am further awakened. It takes great courage and in-sight….’seeing into’ Self…for this vibration of voice to carry this message.

Waking up. Knowing that I’m safe in being awake. And knowing that I am never alone.

Breathing is good….

Ramblings of an ugly duckling….

I was in the shower this morning, thinking about stuff. I recalled my experience of the week-end and of how we’re really not separate; and of how we are in each other’s lives not to judge or fix or rescue each other but to be the invitations for us to discover more about ourselves, to be the opportunity for us to see in another that which we have not yet noticed in ourselves. My life and its challenges, trials and triumphs is never about anyone but me. When I remember that, my life expands.

Listening to the morning news, I was reminded yet again of what I notice as this spiral of increasing density and intensity that is forming itself around me. The world…the climate….the conflict….and I became aware of a flood of thoughts and sensations that feel like a barrage of content-less information but information nonetheless. Flashes and fragments of thoughts, notions, ideas, sounds, sensations – impossible to sort them neatly into rows of what makes sense and what doesn’t; into some logical, linear structured form of expression that will allow for a formula/answer to present itself. Like ’show and tell’, a final product that I can hold out to others and say, “See? This is how it works!” and they will all nod and be delighted to discover their own potential.

Instead, what I am left with is the sense of chaos that comes from having far more data to process than the device is designed for or, at least, that I (in this moment) know how to surrender into; a sense of a huge wave of information trying to press its way into a channel that is far too small to manage it, like the ocean trying to make its way through a garden hose without ripping it to shreds; and an intense desire to stay with it and see if this time, some new thought may take center stage or if this time, some new sense of ‘me’ may emerge for me to discover. Although it feels like eons ago, I do remember the time when I did not yet know that I am a quantum biological processor. I marvel at all that I have experienced in my life since then, and I wonder: what is the ‘more’ that seems to be standing in the shadows, just waiting for me to be ready, willing and able to see? What else awaits my own evolution?

We seem to think that what we have in common is our humanity and our attention on knowledge and content – and my deep sense of frustration that what appears to be so evident, so simple and so real for me seems to be so impossible for so many to even consider. And I wonder….what is there for me to discover about myself within this observation? Who do I need to become that I am not yet, such that so much more would be possible? What of my own limitations am I being invited to notice?

What comes to mind for me is this hesitation I am often aware of…this sense of a voice in the wilderness, sometimes wondering: am I crazy? Am I the only one who can see this? Am I the only one for whom this is so easy, so evident and so essential to who I am? Clearly, on the holodeck of my experience, I often feel like a manifestation of the Yellow Pages commercial – the bright orange one in a sea of grey. Is it about being out of step or is it about overlapping realities…two worlds sharing the same space? But I digress, as I get caught up in the swirl of my own forgetfulness…..

What would life be like if we were to discover something else as our common denominator…as the common thread that weaves its way through us all…that we might redesign our lives?

And in that moment, I become aware of how my world view of not who but WHAT we are is so different from what I hear around me. Not so much in how the content is expressed but much more in the meaning that this content takes on in how we live, from one day to the next. I also become aware of how I sometimes tire of talking about it; writing about it; speaking about it; etc. recognizing just how terrifying it seems to be for people to even consider this as a possibility in their lives – even when their lives are miserable!

It is one thing to speak to the science of what we now know a human being to be (that is, a quantum biological processor). It is so much more to have to stop and consider: now that I know that, what does it really mean in terms of how I LIVE? It’s not enough to know it and keep living from being what I was before I knew that. It’s imperative that I stop…and consider…now that I know, what does it mean when I take my next breath? That’s not so easy. It means I have to let go of just doing/being what I know how to do/be, and become willing to test myself, my world and my ability to create it.

In this moment, the words of (I believe) Wayne Dyer drift into my awareness: we are not human beings having a spiritual experience but spiritual beings having a human experience. What does that mean to how we live from one day to the next? If we don’t stop and consider it – personally, each of us from the inside, where we live – it becomes just so much more blah-blah-blah that we write about and philosophize about and nothing changes. The point becomes: when I choose to live – this moment, and the next moment, and the next, etc. – as the spiritual being that I am, what do I do? What thoughts do I think? What words do I choose? What choice do I make? What life do I manifest?

The one thing that all human beings have in common is a body. Without it, we can’t exist or function in this world. Interestingly enough, as varied as this body may be in its external appearance, its form and function are identical. It is not the device that varies from one to the other – it is the information that the device processes (calibrates, gathers, stores and retrieves) that makes us unique.

The reason that I am not you is not because your nervous system is different from mine – it is because what your nervous systems processes is different from mine!

And here’s where it gets mucky for people: I am (you are) not my (your) body. The body is a quantum biological processor that is the vehicle through which the unique expression that I AM manifests in a physical world. What does that mean on a daily basis?

What it means is that I am not my body, I am the signal/vibration/essence of ‘being’ that the body makes manifest in a physical world. Although my body is mortal, the signal that I AM is immortal. If I am immortal, am I not the godforce?

Imagine if we all – every one of the soon-to-be 9 billion of us – got that! Imagine if we all ‘got’ that we are not the body, we are the signal. And imagine if we all ‘got’ that the signal that each of us is, is the godforce in expression in a physical world. How does the godforce live? My bet is, pretty differently from how we’re living now.

You can be sure that living as the godforce, there is no need to control. Nor is there scarcity, since I can manifest whatever I choose – so the need for greed and all of its sub-sets, disappears. There is no need for one godforce to hate another, since we are all from the same source, meaning I would be hating myself. And maybe that’s what it’s about: I can’t hate you unless and until I’m first committed to hating myself. My experience of working with others demonstrates this to be accurate.

I don’t have a conclusion. I’m also aware that it is not information we lack, since we have plenty of that available. Nor is it our ability to understand what we know that is compromised in some way. How many times do we need to read about quantum this and energetic that before we ‘get’ it? So, if it’s not information we lack, then what is it?

There is a disconnect between our ability to know and understand, and our ability to engage. There is a gap between philosophically choosing and engaging. To engage anything is a process of the body, and when I involve my body, I become visible for all to see. I can keep my thoughts ‘private’ but when I choose to engage, I am telling the world who I am choosing to be.

It is not a process of the intellect – so it is not dependent on knowledge or understanding. It is a process of the body – and your body and mine are deeply, profoundly, relentlessly, rigorously and collective taught….no, pummeled into knowing! … that the one thing for sure that we are NOT is the godforce. Otherwise, why would we ever just mindlessly, blindly do/think/be what someone else tells us to do/think/be? We would think, speak and choose for ourselves; and we would be the truth of who we are, no matter the environment or circumstances, knowing that we are just fine.

As much as some may think that would cause our world to fall apart, I believe it would actually cause our world to come to life.

Breathing is good……